"the house"
About 4 pm yesterday, the listing agent called me and said that “the house”, which was owned by her aunt, was currently under contract…as of last Friday. She went on to say that if it didn’t work out (but she felt it would) that she would contact me. I felt really disappointed and wished I hadn’t mentioned it on the blog. When Jack got home and I told him and he didn’t look as disappointed as I was feeling, which made me feel worse; sort of down and alone. This morning I wondered why I was giving up so easily… throwing in the towel? If this is not the house for us then I can accept that. But this blanket of doubt, disappointment, discouragement, I will not accept that.
One of the things that I loved about the look of this house was its’ potential. What about me? What about my potential to live the life that I want? I don’t want the contract on this home to “fall through”…I don’t want someone else’s dream to take a detour. I also don’t believe that this home was meant for us and for them and that the right owner will be there. I read an anonymous quote this morning that said, “Life is a series of rough drafts, most of which are thrown out.” …so maybe this isn’t our house but there is a perfect house for us. I think it is in Kittery Point, and I am ready to be surprised and delighted by the wonder of life.
“Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told: ’I am with you kid. Let’s go’.” ~Maya Angelou
Come north,Mary, come north. Don’t stop in Kittery. We still consider that as part of Massachusetts.
Nancy in Maine
Agreed, Nancy! I glad you said it, though. LOL
Oh my, YES!!!!! This house was clearly a sign along the way. An affirmation that you’re on the right trail, driving forward towards your dreams. Whether this house or another, whether Kittery or another nown, whether Maine, or Rhode Island, or NH…. You’ve stepped into the flow. You’re DOING it. You’re In Process, and the result is malleable. Thank you for taking us on this journey and adventure with you. It’s delightful and inspiring!
Oops, that should have been “Kittery or another TOWN”! But “nown” could almost pass for “known”…. Have a wonderful day!
There were 3 significant homes in my life in the past 25 years. All of which I had no idea, when I saw them and fell in love with them, how I would possibly “make” it happen. The first two, I invested a lot of excitement and anxiety into as the process unfolded. Both of them worked out, and I had glorious years in each of them. The one I am currently in since this spring, came unexpectedly. I have lived on the lake I am on 4 different times since I was 4 years old. I am now 63.
I started joking after the 3rd home on the lake, that I had to live on one more side to have lived on all 4 sides, north, south, east and west. Late last winter, my daughter and son-in-law approached me about moving to a cottage on the side I had not lived on yet. They wanted a place to bring their small daughters to swim. It’s a lovely shallow and sandy spring fed lake. I said “maybe” since I already lived in a tiny cottage on a different side of the lake, and we looked at a couple of cottages for sale. One of them felt like “home” the minute we entered it. It was charming and needed a bunch of work done on it.
The negotiating started and it didn’t look promising. The seller wanted a ridiculous amount of money. Because I wasn’t the buyer, I was able to stay somewhat removed from it all. There were many “snags” along the way and I was informed about each one.
Somehow, I just kept seeing myself there and remained emotionally detached. I also remained open to whatever else the universe might have in mind to fulfill my dreams. After, 3 months of negotiating by others, I moved in. Another 3 months of renovation ensued to turn my little cottage into a perfect peace of paradise. I just smile and see how the universe heard my “silly” statement over the years about living on all sides of the lake. I think that it knows, hears and remembers every detail and all we have to do is relax and allow.
Holly Katie, I am catching up so late tonight ‘at the farm’ – 9 p.m. for me in
Arizona, midnight for my east coast girlfriends! and there is so much to think about today from all of the comments, but I have to say, your phrase, ‘relax and allow’ just jumped out at me. What wonderful words to begin, or end! each and every day. Another ’3 word-er’ that my yoga teacher often uses between poses, is ” pause and feel” – I love them both! “Relax and allow, pause and feel!” Thank you Holly Katie!
When I was first thinking of moving here, I fell in love with (and carried around a photograph of) another house altogether. When I actually moved here, I ended up buying another house altogether — and I’m glad I did. The first house was beautiful but somewhat isolated. Now, for the first time in my adult life, I have genuine neighbors, the kind who cook for you for eight weeks when you break an ankle. I’m not sure it unfolded the way it was supposed to — because I’m not sure I believe there is “a way it’s supposed to” — but I’m happy I’m here.
Mary, anyone who has set a goal and has encountered a pothole on the way can identify with your feelings. My heart goes out to you!
It also seems that an initial adversity can bring the “magical helpers” out of the woodwork to help us firmly define our wishes, and to reaffirm to the Universe that “Yes, this needs to happen in some wonderful fashion, doggone it!”
Sending you warm wishes for magical helpers appearing at your door, “parachuting in” from all points between….
Mary, I forgot to add another important detail to my little story. In 1999 my husband and I divorced after 30 years of marriage. We had lived in one of those lovely cottages on the lake. It was sold and we went our separate ways for 10 years.
One of the things we said many years ago while married and living in that cottage was, that we looked forward to when our kids were grown and would bring our grandchildren to the lake, so that we could teach the little ones to swim. Of course, I thought that wish that was sent out into the universe was one of the wishes that probably would not happen.
I have to say that my former husband and I did a lot of growing and making peace in the 10 years that we were apart.
Apparently, God never forgot about our plans. My former husband and I live together in cottage number 4 and spent this glorious summer teaching our four little grandchildren how to swim.
i’m probably not alone in feeling this–i am so grateful, mary, that you did mention “the house” on the blog; and that you do include your personal feats and disappointments. i feel so blessed to be a part of white feather farm.
i live on the west coast (not coast-line) in oregon; i’ve never explored much of the east coast (only the jersey shore in my much younger hipper years). before your blog i hardly knew that maine existed, not really of course, I just didn’t know anyone who’d ever lived there or had been there———-
so now i’ve pulled out my map of maine, internet searches, and have been exploring your coastal excursions. ahh, it’s enchanting to pack along with your dreams on the shore. i visit our oregon and washington coasts often. there’s just ‘something’ about it’s vastness—-
I love the stories of cottages and such here today! Mary I had this bright French’s mustard color in mind when you described “the house”, I see it is more grey poupon! It is lovely, but I bet there is another, even more charming home just for you and Jack.
When you mentioned Kittery Point, Maine, I did a google map to see where it was. I went to street view and ended up right in front of the mustard yellow house with the purple door. Phew, I got goosebumps. Best wishes to you and Jack on your next move wherever it may be.
Hi Mary
Sometimes I get that way too and there is something I am looking forward too but there is at this time, but it seems it won’t happen. I have to remind myself that I have to do like I did when we had our fire and I have to trust God, he is in charge and if it meant for me it will happen. It is hard sometimes to let ourselves do this but its the best way and I have to remember that too, as there is a situation in my life that I was kinda looking to forward too and it may not happen so I have to just trust God too. I also try to remember that God is my pilot and guide and he will do what is best. Hope I made sense to all who read this. God bless you all. P.S. When I was trusting God for what we needed after our fire, he took care of all that we needed and praise him for it and may I not take my eyes off Him.
Mary,
I love the house and will love up Kittery Point, Maine. I have never been in New England but have always heard how beautiful it is. Maine especially.
I have always loved Colonial type houses and the colors of this one are just beautiful.
Pray the prayer that never fails. aka Jan Karon and the Mitford series-”Lord, Your Will Be Done!”
I just love those books and if you haven’t read them , you must. Talk about upliftling! I am planning on rereading them this winter.
God has the perfect house, town, and community for you and Jack.
Isn’t it exciting,planning a move? New people, new things, new experiences. They keep us young. You don’t want to get in a rut. You know what a rut is don’t you? A grave with both ends kicked out!
I think of you every day and love the blog. Thank you for writing it. Thank you for sharing your life with us. it makes ours better!
Gwen Coker
Natchitoches, La.
It’s a really sweet house and I can see how it struck your fancy, but take heart, because if it is to be yours there will be a way without spoiling someone else’s dreams. If not, then you’ll be lead in the right direction. You both are saying yes to change and that’s the beginning.