Tommy and me (31 years ago… living in graduate student housing and getting ready for Matt to be born)
My oldest son Tom recently became engaged, and as I look at the wonderful new photographs, I’ve also felt drawn to look at old photographs, and to remind myself to savor every moment, slow down and be present. 31 years ago, Tom was 3 years old and I was 25. I can remember the day that photograph was taken as we stood on the steps of our little rented apartment.
Tommy’s dad and I were talking about life with a new baby: wondering how things would change with two little kids, if we were going to have a boy or a girl, how Tommy would react to the new baby, deciding which nursery school to send Tommy to in the fall. These were some of the questions that we had back then, and it seemed like we were always in a rush to get them answered, so we could move on to the next thing.
Today we are talking about Tom and Lindsay’s wedding. There are questions that are, in the moment, unanswered. One of the biggest illusions (in life) is that we will somehow get all of our ducks lined up, all of our questions answered, so we can sit back and relax, but this isn’t life. There will always be questions, decisions and future events to be considered, so we are going to relax now: in the planning, in the questions, in the delightful uncertainty that is Life.
We are still planning: planning on savoring every moment of this magical time!
Tom and Lindsay on the day of their engagement, August 15th
“Today is life: the only life you are sure of. Make the most of today. Shake yourself awake. Let the winds of enthusiasm sweep through you. Dale Carnegie
The website of their friend, and amazing photographer who took these photos, Derek DiLuzio, is: http://derekdiluzio.com
Oh Mary,
What a beautiful post!
Congratulations to you all!
Much love and very best wishes for now and for the unfolding lovely future.
From Fran
Thank you Fran!
Mary, Tom & Lindsay have the same smiles. I think they look well suited. No relationship is ever easy over the long haul but I’ve always thought when people marry and resemble each other, they have a head start on a happier relationship for some reason. What an attractive about-to-be mom you were…all those years ago and I’ll bet it seems only yesterday to you, doesn’t it.
SandyP in Canada
Thank you Sandy and yes it does feel like yesterday! and when I think of how swiftly the past 31 years have gone (and in 31 years, I’ll almost 88 years old, it makes me want to savor this moment even more!)
Handsome, happy couple…with beautiful smiles. Congratulations!!!! :O)
Mary,
Ever since I found your blog (through Kon Katz) I have been struck by the parallels and similarities in our lives, outlooks and spiritual perspectives. I enjoy reading your words. Many time when my day is troublesome, there is something in your post that turns my whole perspective right around. Often I have thought to post a comment, but today the day the connection was so strong I had to share. My oldest daughter will be getting married Sept 8th. She got engaged last august too (18th) She and Joe had been together for 6 years, and althoug they are young (23 and 25) I know they belong together.
In preparartion for one of the wedding projects I too have been going through her photos growing up. So many emotions and so many wonderful memories.
My younger daughter (15) has been going through a difficult phase of her adolescent years and seeing the pix of her as a little one has also helped me remember the happy, adventurous girl she is!
I remember well that feeling of wanting to get to the next phase, even in all the wedding planning there is often a sense of “Lets just get this done…” but this past week I have forced my racing mind to slow down and just think about what a wonderful day is coming. It has helped me keep my daughter focused everytime the details seem to overwhelm her.
So thank you with all of my heart. May your sons wedding be wondrous and enjoy your new daughter-in-law. They are a sweet and beautiful couple.
Blessings
Deb R (Upstate NY)
Congratulations, joy, love, and blessings to you all!!!!!! xxoo Mandy
Dear Mary. Congratulations! There is such a beautiful and joyful feeling that emanates from the photograph of your son and future daughter in-law! Such light…such genuine goodness. Thanks for helping us all to stay in the moment, to cherish the balancing act of being present while also being excited about what the future holds.
Thank you Debra and you know, I had the same reaction when I saw these photos …their happiness is so real…just wonderful
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This post spoke to me. I often find myself rushing “to get through this”, whatever “this” is a the time. Right now “this” is problems at work, an ill elderly mother, a remodelling project in process at my house … too much. Relaxation seems far off.
What a lovely post … a delightful peek into the past and present!
Thank you Karen….delighted is how we are all feeling!
Congratulations!!! What a beautiful couple and I am so happy for all of you!!
The idea of savoring every moment really resonates with me this morning, as my son headed off for his first day of high school. I know these next few years will fly by, and I don’t want them to!
Congratulations to you, Mary and your son and future DIL! I too am preparing for the marriage of my daughter this fall. Oct. 13 she will wed the love of her life. It will be a wonderful day, I am thinking! Here’s to enjoying the moments…
Beautiful couple and beautiful post, thank you Mary for sharing this with us.
Your posts and especially today’s joyous photo are my daily morning vitamins, Mary! Congratulations to Tom (and oh what a cute little Tommy and Mommy Mary you made!) and his bride to be! xoxox
Oh thank you Susan!…I look back and think, “I looked like a kid!” and yet I thought I was so grown up…and thank you for the wishes too…it is a new and wonderful feeling to be in this place (and we love Lindsay more than words can express)
Your Tom and his bride-to-be are a gorgeous couple, Mary! You are right to slow down and “live” every moment. The photo album in your head is waiting to be filled. Congrats to you and the entire family for this celebration of love and life.
thank you Suzanne…we are still riding the wave of happiness!
What a wonderful time in your family’s life. Also what an amazing beautiful couple they are! Enjoy this happiness! Joan
The joy leaps out of that photo of Tom and his fiancee. Thanks for sharing your happiness (past, present, and future) with all of us, Mary.
Thank you Kelly,…it is my pleasure to share this very happy part of my life….and I so appreciate the good thoughts!
What a happy time in your family! Wishing you all joy, joy, joy!
Oh thank you , thank you Donna!
just caught your blog here at the end of day. so glad i didn’t miss this one. these are two bright stars, your children, and beautiful are the expressions of love to each other and all who know them. look how many the ripples of joy eminate from their generous spirits. so happy for all of you.
Mazel tov!! Congratulations, proud and rightfully so, mother-in-law Mary! What a transcendence between both pictures—new beginnings in each. Magical indeed.
As always, I so appreciate your observations Cheryl…I am almost bursting with happiness!
Why Mary, that very beautiful blonde woman is so in love with your very handsome son. Its written all over her face. Im so happy for y’all.