sinking into the YES of life

New couch with Eleanor sleeping on it

I started to write a post today about saying no. About how sometimes we must stay focused and true to our visions, which can mean saying no to other things, but as I wrote I felt deflated. I didn’t feel good writing about that today. When I sat here at my desk and said, “Yes”, I could feel myself coming back to center.

Walking past one of our local thrift stores yesterday, I spotted a big pink velvet couch on their porch. I’ve wanted a velvet couch for a long time, (the cats don’t seem to scratch velvet which is a huge plus for us) and I love the feel of it. I walked onto the porch and sat down into a big pink cloud…oh how heavenly! and big (over 7 feet long) …Our home is small; a little over 800 square feet and we already have a couch.

I went inside and asked the price. $30. I said yes. Then I thought, “Where are we going to put it?” and I knew that Jack would ask the same thing. We moved a small table out and it fits pretty well in our T.V/living room. I love big, soft, vintage furniture. I wouldn’t care if I ever again sat at a dining room table. I like sinking in, putting my feet up, eating with my plate on my lap. It is a part of my adventure here in this lifetime, ….it is a “Yes” for me.

“The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure“. Joseph Campbell

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Peaceful solutions

"Mater Domini" (Mother of God) sculpture, circa 1450, Williams College Museum of art...Jack and I went there a few days ago, and I could not stop looking at this image...she looks like real strength to me.

Jack took my car in on Monday to have the oil pan replaced. I asked him to handle it because I could feel that some part of my ego still wanted to hear the words from them, “We are so sorry Mary, we made a mistake, tried to cover it up, and could not be sorrier.” (I really wanted an apology…can you tell?!)

There is a question, “Would you rather be right or happy?” My higher self always wants to be happy;  to make my, and everyone else’s, life easier. My egoic self wants to prove that I am right, makes a moral issue out of things, thinks that it/I will be happy if I can prove that I am right. The words this side of myself would say are, “It’s the principle of the thing. Fight to the death.” So the most “peaceful” solution for me, was to ask for help, let it go, and imagine what I wanted to happen (my car to be fixed and the dealership to take care of the expense), and not what I feared. If Jack wasn’t around to help, I would have had to work more on this before I brought my car in for the service!

In the past, I was not the type of person who would step aside, and ask my husband (a man) to handle something like a car issue. Remember that old Helen Ready song?, “I am woman hear me roar!”…but it was really exhausting, roaring all the time. I didn’t want to continue to live my life getting all worked up, and making everything a social/political issue.

This does not mean sulking silence or discouraged resignation either. There is a much more powerful, yet subtle energy available at the “level of the heart”….how do you get there? Stop the mental fighting, get out of the mind’s need to figure it out, meditate, think a different quality of thought, imagine what you want instead of what you fear; in other words, change your mind/thoughts and let the new, higher quality thoughts bring a higher quality solution.

I’ve been learning a new way for the past 25 years….I am still learning it now. Sometimes it is really easy, sometimes not.  My car is back and is perfect. They did not apologize to Jack. He didn’t care.

“What would our world be like if we ceased to worry about “right” and “wrong,” or “good” and “evil,” and simply acted so as to maximize well-being, our own and that of others? Would we lose anything important”? - Sam Harris

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