Taking life lightly

My bags…I’ve gotten rid of the more serious looking bags in recent months.

After writing Friday’s post, about bringing more fun into our lives, I couldn’t get the image of Mary Poppins out of my head. I hadn’t seen the movie since I was a kid, so I did some research on-line about her character. I loved the way that she was described as a magical person who blew into town on the east wind, changed everything around her for the better, and when she was done, blew away again; carpet-bag in one hand, umbrella in the other.

I also loved the way that she didn’t get ruffled or upset by the unhappiness of those around her. She kept her center, knew what she wanted to achieve…and had fun doing it. We had just watched the movie “Cold Comfort Farm” and the heroine, Flora, had that same energy. Both of these characters refused to worry about life, had a vision for what they wanted to achieve, and everything (and everyone) around them transformed.

Friday evening, I decided to look for one of my travel bags, found it, and hung it on the door by my computer with the thought, “I wonder when I’ll be taking my next trip?”

At about noon on Saturday, my brother called and said, “Are you up for an adventure?”  He went on to say that he and his daughter (my niece Kelly) were going to be biking across Florida and wanted someone to accompany them who would be available in case of a flat tire or some other unexpected need they might have. They’d originally planned to fly down in April but had just decided to drive down (this week) instead. Then he said, “We’ll stay in great B &B’s along the way, you’ll have all the days to yourself, we just want to be able to call you if we need something. I’ll pay all of your expenses, plus we’ll have a lot of fun. I think we’d be a great trio! What do you think?”

So with a little rearranging of my schedule (which will be minimally interrupted since most of the work that I do is by phone…. and I am imaging wonderful sessions from my warm, lovely, southern perch) and the amazing flexibility of Jack, I’ll be leaving on Wednesday for 10 days.

It astounds me how things show up when I am “light” about them….light about life.  I can see such a pattern in the manifestation of my desires: when I hold on tightly, intensely, unhappily wanting something to happen, it seems to elude me. All day Friday, I had been singing happy songs (out loud) and kept thinking about being playful, fun and happy. (I also was also pondering the idea Mary Poppins as an archetype…something that I will be thinking more about!).

“Humanity has advanced, when it has advanced, not because it has been sober, responsible, and cautious, but because it has been playful…” Tom Robbins

 

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Won’t you come out to play?

Bodhi watching something outside the window

It feels like the deep winter today. It’s cold and dark and even the cats don’t want to go out for more than a couple of minutes. As I sat outside this morning, thinking about the day and how to brighten it, I thought it might be fun to play a game with any of you who would like to play today too!

I have several decks of affirmation cards and one set that I like a lot is called, “The Teachings of Abraham, Well Being Cards” by Esther and Jerry Hicks. If you would like me to pick a card for you, I would love to do it. Just comment with one game that you like to play or fun thing that you do (or even would like to do) and I’ll pick a card (without looking of course) for you and post it as a reply.

“The true object of all human life is play. Earth is a task garden; heaven is a playground.” Gilbert Chesterton

 

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The game of Life

We put an old rug down in the kitchen and Fred was the first to enjoy it

Jack and I saw a house on-line (in Middlebury) yesterday, so we decided to take a ride up and do a drive-by. Everything about it: age (it was built in 1798), location, and neighborhood, felt perfect. Driving around the block several times (very slowly) I noticed someone moving inside and thought that they might be excited too (thinking that a potential buyer was outside).

As we were headed home again, the image of the childhood game, Duck, Duck, Goose, came to mind. I loved that game. We all sat on little chairs in a circle and waited while one kid walked around the outside of the circle, touching each kid’s head as they walked by, saying mostly “duck” …but when he/she said “GOOSE” you were supposed to jump up as quickly as possible and chase the kid before they reached your seat. If you caught them then you got to sit back down again and they continued to be the tagger.

It was fun sitting, waiting, and not knowing when you were going to hear the word “GOOSE!’ and it was fun watching your friends running around the circle being chased, and it was fun being the chaser.

There is a time to sit and wait but when I remember that I’m still “in the game” (even when I’m not apparently moving); when I can enjoy watching the other players, some who are sitting too, but others who are running, and I can clap and cheer for them, then life feels whole. The element of variety and suspense is what makes games fun…. and the same thing can apply to my life, if I choose to look at it in a new way.

Life is a song – sing it. Life is a game – play it. Life is a challenge – meet it. Life is a dream – realize it. Life is a sacrifice – offer it. Life is love – enjoy it. Sai Baba

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Nap time

Eleanor sleeping on the Turbo Scratcher toy

We got home last night at 10:30 which is super-late for us, but we were having such a great time, that we didn’t want it to end. The cats really don’t care how late I go to bed, they want me up by 5 and I generally oblige (because they won’t give up until I do).  I sat at my computer and tried to think of something to write but drew a blank so I looked at real estate on-line, ate oatmeal, looked at a book with some gorgeous pictures of Easter celebrations…still no inspiration. …it is sort of delightful to be a little tired out from having a good time!

“Writing is 90 percent procrastination: reading magazines, eating cereal out of the box, watching infomercials.” Paul Rudnick

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The Spirit of Play

The birthday girl Margaret (on left), and her friend Lynne

When my son Tom was three, he wanted a toy gun more than anything. He asked us, it seemed, almost everyday for one, but we did not want to encourage “violent” behaviour so did not give in to his pleading. We bought him a plastic yard set; rake, shovel and hoe instead. I looked out the window one day, and saw him with the  plastic rake, held shoulder-high, being “aimed” at his friend. They were “playing guns” with the rake and shovel. We finally broke down and bought him a toy gun and he loved it.

I never played with guns as a child and never had any interest in them. I made some attempts at introducing toys, into my sons lives, that were not traditionally played with by boys. I once bought them a doll house (something that I had always wanted as a little girl). Matt dismembered some all the dolls, beheaded others, and made it into a little haunted house…not exactly what I had in mind.

My friend (and neighbor) Margaret, celebrated her 50th birthday on Saturday with food, a bon fire, and Laser Tag. I hadn’t played anything like this before, but thought I’d try one game, just to experience it. Teams were chosen and we all got a gun and started playing at around 5:30. At 8:00, it was getting too dark to play. I had on a lightweight T-shirt and shorts and didn’t notice that it was getting chilly, didn’t feel particularly hungry. I felt like I was ten years old again….it was odd and wonderful.

I like the thought that there is something in this wild, unknowable universe called “The Spirit of Play” and that it shows up to rejuvenate and refresh our spirits, minds and bodies, wherever beings (human and animal) gather for the purpose of fun, non-harm, and celebration. I think that I would like to become more familiar with this fun little spirit in the second half of life!

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Inventing new games. Playing “with” the Universe

Jack's school picture, 45 years ago

I came home Wednesday to find this photograph of Jack on my desk.  He was 16 at the time it was taken. I couldn’t stop looking at it. I’ve never seen him smile that way before…so relaxed, so happy looking, so fresh. He seems to be thinking, “Don’t worry about anything, life is really good!”

I didn’t know Jack in his teens, or twenties, or thirties or forties…I met him the year he turned 50. I was 45 at the time. We had both lived a lot; many struggles, many good things.  When people say to me that we are a “good couple” it always make me wonder what they see. We have a tendency to bicker …a lot. He thinks that it is “playful”. I think it’s just a bad habit. We both like things our own way, but have built a life that mostly works for us.We didn’t have children together, but he adores my sons. I never knew his parents, but my parents love him.
Lately we’ve been contemplating a big change in our lives; thinking about moving to the seacoast of Maine. The idea of moving has been around for a while. At one point, we looked at houses in Cambridge, but everything seemed wrong about that direction so we dropped the idea (or I should say, I dropped it…Jack never wanted to move into town). On my trip to New Castle, NH a month ago, the thought that we could live by the ocean sprung into my mind.  When I presented it to Jack, he said he liked the idea too, but I know him well enough to realize that I will have to be the one who keeps the idea alive for this to happen. Moving is fairly easy for me. My family moved at least 10 times before I was 13. Jack lived in the same house until he left for college.

Yesterday, I found myself talking to this picture of Jack about the move. I have never done this before. I’ve imagined having conversations with people; seeing them in my mind, as relaxed and receptive, and have  recommended this to friends and clients as a way to get positive energy moving in a difficult situation, but I have never talked to a photograph and felt such “openness”. Every idea I proposed to this 16-year-old version of Jack, he seemed to reply, “Great, love it!” What I really liked about doing this was it felt like a game. I heard a spiritual teacher once say that the more you play with life, the more it plays back and the easier it gets.

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Wear your play clothes!

I received an invitation to a friend’s wedding, several weeks ago and was delighted when I read the words,  ”Dress is casual. Wear your play clothes….” Over the past several years, I have been trying to remember, or maybe learn anew, how to play.
When I was visiting the ocean last week, I stood knee-high in the very cold water and watched a bunch of kids playing around me. They were all fully engaged in their games, so much so, that they did not notice the cold. I can remember as a child, my mother saying, “You have to come out of the water and warm up. Your lips are blue and you are shivering!” I also recall that I did not want to stop playing and wasn’t really aware of my body until my mother pointed it out. Being so cold, that I was turning blue and shivering, but not wanting to stop, sounds really foreign to me now. I can also remember driving home from the beach, after a full day of fun, feeling so good.

Just the thought of having clothes designated especially for play makes me smile. I may have to take another trip to the thrift store for the purpose of buying these special wedding duds. What would they look like? I think the look is not the point. They need to be so comfortable that I can forget about my body for a while. I need to be able to forget about my body so I can remember something deeper.

 

Lots of research is being done on the power of happiness, joy and play to heal both the body and mind. I bought the cd, The Power of Joy, by Dr. Christiane Northrup several years ago on a friend’s recommendation. It is absolutely wonderful; funny, insightful, inspiring (and inexpensive!). I cannot recommend it highly enough!

http://www.amazon.com/Power-Joy-Deliberate-Pursuit-Pleasure/dp/1401923089

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