Blessing others…with a smile

Jack and the butterfly

At the end of my run yesterday, I noticed a butterfly in my neighbor’s driveway. I put my hand close to its front legs, and it crawled onto my finger. As I walked home, I kept thinking it was going to fly away, but it didn’t, so when I got back to our house, I called Jack to show him and asked him to bring a little water with him.

He held out his hand, and the butterfly crawled onto his finger. He’d just washed his hands, so they were damp, and the butterfly stuck out its little tongue and began to drink the tiny drops of water. I went inside to get the camera and then we placed the butterfly on a leaf (with an additional few drops of water in case it was still thirsty) where it stayed for a couple of minutes before flying off.

A number of years ago, I worked for a community of nuns, and one of them had a special love for birds. One hot summer day, a tiny bird landed in the courtyard. Sister Sarah had been talking with me in the kitchen, but noticed it and said, “Everyone thinks that birds need to be fed, but forget that they get very thirsty” as she filled a shallow bowl with water, and took it outside to place near the bird.

Sister Sarah was always doing “little things” like that…things that made life better for everyone she came in contact with. One of the ways that she uplifted me was by smiling when we first saw each other. I always felt like she was genuinely happy to see me, and even now, years later when I think about her smile, it makes me feel good.

I thought about her a lot yesterday …maybe I can’t always offer “concrete” help to another, but I can always give them a smile…at least in my heart.

“Condemn none: if you can stretch out a helping hand, do so. If you cannot, fold your hands, bless your brothers, and let them go their own way”.  Swami Vivekananda

P.S. Jenn Peek was the winner of the book!

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1000 thank you’s

A rose plant that I bought a month ago (hoping to eventually transplant at our new home) is in its second period of blooming!

I ran early this morning and the thought came to me to see if I could say “Thank You”, 1000 times over the weekend. Doing some quick calculations, I figured that if I sat for 3 minutes in the morning and evening, and dedicated those times to just thinking and feeling the words, “Thank You”, that by Sunday night, I would have said/thought this at least 1000 times (and I am not about to actually count because that would feel like a chore and this is not about struggle in any way).  I also wondered how this might change me: what doors would open inside. And then I thought about he power of doing this together as a community.

So, it is Friday and if you would like to join me in this practice/adventure/challenge then you are invited!  It would be wonderful to hear from anyone who would like to share about your experiences either giving this a try, or with a personal story of gratitude, a quote or a word. I’ll be doing this too; both checking in and posting when I feel moved to do so.

Four Rules

1.Only do this if it feels like a Good idea…this should not be another thing to feel bad about!

2.and even if you only get to say, 10 thank you’s, you are welcome to “borrow” from the group to meet your quota!

3. Comment as many times (or not) as you would like over the weekend.

3. If you are not feeling at all grateful,  maybe dip into the pool of gratitude that will be created here and just float and absorb the Love.

“If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough“. Meister Eckhart

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The real reason for my trip

Daisy…sitting in my backseat, waiting to be picked up by her owner.

I took a quick trip to Manchester yesterday. I needed to pick something up, and get a watch battery replaced for Jack. About a mile from the center of downtown Manchester, I noticed what looked like a dog running along the side of the road. I slowed down, and at that moment, she ran into the middle of traffic. Cars were weaving around her so I pulled over and got out of my car to try to slow things down. As I began to approach her, she ran back to the side of the road, in the opposite direction. Hurrying to my car, yet uncertain about how to proceed, I realized that she was again in the center of the road, still running away from me.

I quickly began walking toward her, and heard someone yell, “Mary!” I looked up and my friend Ashley Bridge (a massage therapist who shares the office building with me) had also seen the dog and pulled over. Cambridge is at least 45 minutes from Manchester yet we were both there at that moment. Now the little dog was between us and we were able to grab her.

We called the phone number on her collar, and her very-relieved owner said that she had been on a hike with her dogs when Daisy wandered off, and she’d been looking for her ever since. Daisy is an old dog (I believe her owner said that she was 15) and seemed a little confused but oh so sweet. It was a happy reunion.

I never did get what I went to Manchester for, (the item wasn’t in and the jeweler was out of that type of battery) but it didn’t matter. I realized that the reason I made that trip had nothing to do my original idea.

Do we really ever have to question that we are all somehow connected at the level of the “heart”…connected by Love!? Right before I left for Manchester, I had stopped by the Coop to have a brief chat with my friend Nancy, and used the bathroom before I headed out. As I stood there in the bathroom, a poster (that I had never noticed) caught my eye. The title of it was, “How to Build Community”, and I don’t know why, but I took the time to read it. I liked the poster, but the suggestion that stood out was, “Help a lost dog.”

The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.  Blaise Pascal

(Information on how to purchase this poster is in the following link    http://syracuseculturalworkers.com/poster-how-build-community

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kindness: a universal language

polite, busy and unrushed

I was standing in the corner of this restaurant in Tulum, waiting for our take-out order. It was extremely busy, and I had my back pushed tight up against a wall (trying to stay out of the way of the waiters and kitchen staff) but no one was looking at me like, “What is she standing back here for? or Move! or Back up!”…actually quite the opposite. When anyone caught my eye, they always smiled, and in my vain attempts to back even further up against the wall, trying to give them a little more room to navigate by, they always said, “Gracias.”

Everyone worked around everyone else with efficiency and a sense of ease, even though the place was full, there was a waiting line outside, 6 people waiting for their take-out orders, and it was at least 90 degrees with no air conditioning. I didn’t hear one raised voice during my 20 minute wait. No chef yelling at kitchen help, no waiters impatient with customers (or vice versa)…it was like a bee-hive pleasantly humming along… and I loved it.

Far too often, I’ve made excuses for my behaviour saying that I was hot, or tired , or not feeling well, and yet deep down, I know that I always have a choice about my actions and treatment of others (and myself!). The food in this restaurant was really good, but what stays with me, is the genuine courtesy that I was shown.

“A word of kindness is seldom spoken in vain, while witty sayings are as easily lost as the pearls slipping from a broken string“. George Dennison Prentice

What kind thoughts can you think about yourself this weekend? What are you doing so well, everyday, that you take this part of yourself for granted, and don’t realize what a gift you are to the world? This might be a good question to ask your higher self over the next few days.

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Kindred spirits: A sea of Love

We’re leaving for Mexico in the morning. I’ve had dreams of swimming in warm turquoise-blue water for years, and tomorrow night I will be. I feel a deep desire to float…just to float without a plan: to suspend thought, and let the beautiful ocean hold me up for a while. Although I won’t be posting during my time away, it is my intention to hold all of you in my heart. I feel that we are kindred spirits here…friends of the deepest kind, even if we have not met face to face. Your presence is such a profound gift to me.

So what about a 10 day “assignment”!? Mine is going to be to repeat,(often over the next 10 days), “I am never alone. I am surrounded, suspended and connected to all of Life, by a sea of Love.”

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.” C. S. Lewis

*******************Bodhi and Noah sitting together on our front walkway Thursday afternoon******************************

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There is a rational explaination for everything?

Jack picked up this piece of iron the other day and when he flipped it over, the words, HAPPY THOUGHT, were there!

The other morning, I noticed that my front right tire looked partially flat. I wasn’t sure if it was safe to drive, so I asked Jack what he thought, and he assured me that it wasn’t totally flat, but also said that I should get it filled up after my morning appointments. I drove to my office, feeling somewhat concerned, and knew I had to clear that before I started my work day. It’s not possible to be present for someone else if I am feeling off or concerned about myself and my life.

As I drove along I thought, “I need to let this go. Give me a little help”, and turned on the radio. I do this fairly frequently while driving, and almost always get a message in a song that helps.

I turned the radio on and the words, “Take it easy, take it easy….don’t let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy…” were being sung into my car. I started laughing out loud and felt a flood of relief, so much so that I forgot to fill my tire. When I got home that evening Jack looked at my car and said, “Did Chris (our mechanic) fill your tire?”. I said, “No, I forgot to do it!” to which he replied, “You did not!”…the long and short of it was that my tire did not appear to be flat and I didn’t put air into it.

There might be a scientific, rational explaination for this, but I don’t care about that. One day, when I was much younger, I was riding in the car with someone and looked up at the sky to see a full rainbow around the sun. I felt a flood of happiness and sense that it was an answer for me. I made the mistake of pointing this out to the man in the car who instantly said, “That is called a ‘sun dog’ and it occurs when the atmostphere………..” He was being “reasonable and rational” but his need to scientifically classify this beautiful sight, sort of sucked the life out of it for me.

I know that a little thing like my tire, is just the tip of a huge and magnificently mysterious universe. The more I notice and appreciate the out-of the-ordinary things that happen, the more I can feel myself expanding as well.

“The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science“. Albert Einstein

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Nap time

Eleanor sleeping on the Turbo Scratcher toy

We got home last night at 10:30 which is super-late for us, but we were having such a great time, that we didn’t want it to end. The cats really don’t care how late I go to bed, they want me up by 5 and I generally oblige (because they won’t give up until I do).  I sat at my computer and tried to think of something to write but drew a blank so I looked at real estate on-line, ate oatmeal, looked at a book with some gorgeous pictures of Easter celebrations…still no inspiration. …it is sort of delightful to be a little tired out from having a good time!

“Writing is 90 percent procrastination: reading magazines, eating cereal out of the box, watching infomercials.” Paul Rudnick

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Imagining the life of our dreams

Debra Saum's cat Oscar in the tub! Her wonderful website is: http://www.debrasaum.com

A few days ago, I noticed that I was feeling a bit off. Then I had a dream that I was back in school and my sons were babies and I couldn’t get to them…..back in struggle. This is an old dream for me and a signal to look at my thinking. It wasn’t hard to see what I had been envisioning (about this new project that I had taken on). I’d been trying very hard to figure out how to do it. I was feeling somewhat alone and afraid that I couldn’t do it. I wasn’t staying true to the end result and seeing it done, I was mentally and emotionally in the frustration of, “How am I going to do this?” I was actually imagining it failing.

If I am not being totally honest with myself, or self-aware enough to notice what I am thinking during the day time, my dreams always show me. And when they are fought with negative feelings and scenes, I know that my thinking has slipped into an old track and my mind is entertaining negative images and scenarios. Equally true, when my dreams are  filled with wonderful, expansive, new and exciting or interesting scenes, even if I doubt my current path, I am reassured that I am heading in the right direction.

It is as if we are playing repetitive tapes in our minds constantly while we are awake, and get so used to these thoughts and images, they have become so much a part of us, that we don’t question or challenge them. Also, we don’t really think that they are that important, or believe that our thoughts really have much to do with our lives.

Emile Coue once said, “When the imagination and will power are in conflict, are antagonistic, it is always the imagination which wins, without any exception.” So I can want something, have a huge desire for a better life, but if I only imagine difficulty, struggle and lack, no matter how much I “want” something new, what I imagine will win out.

So how do we start playing new tapes?  How do we use imagination to create what we would like instead of what we dread or fear? First, we have to see (become aware of) what we are thinking and then start saying/thinking something new. I love the simple, yet powerful affirmation below. I’ve put it up here before but it is a wonder if used “properly”. If I’ve been thinking unhappy, negative thoughts hundreds of times a day, I won’t change if I start saying something new 3 or 4 times a day. Really give it a try. Write out an affirmation and put it in your pocket and say it, feel it, every hour or half hour, then notice what changes.

Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better. Emile Coue

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sinking into the YES of life

New couch with Eleanor sleeping on it

I started to write a post today about saying no. About how sometimes we must stay focused and true to our visions, which can mean saying no to other things, but as I wrote I felt deflated. I didn’t feel good writing about that today. When I sat here at my desk and said, “Yes”, I could feel myself coming back to center.

Walking past one of our local thrift stores yesterday, I spotted a big pink velvet couch on their porch. I’ve wanted a velvet couch for a long time, (the cats don’t seem to scratch velvet which is a huge plus for us) and I love the feel of it. I walked onto the porch and sat down into a big pink cloud…oh how heavenly! and big (over 7 feet long) …Our home is small; a little over 800 square feet and we already have a couch.

I went inside and asked the price. $30. I said yes. Then I thought, “Where are we going to put it?” and I knew that Jack would ask the same thing. We moved a small table out and it fits pretty well in our T.V/living room. I love big, soft, vintage furniture. I wouldn’t care if I ever again sat at a dining room table. I like sinking in, putting my feet up, eating with my plate on my lap. It is a part of my adventure here in this lifetime, ….it is a “Yes” for me.

“The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure“. Joseph Campbell

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The “what ifs”

The view from our vacation house!

I went to be Wed. night saying to myself (over and over like a mantra), “The perfect place for us will present itself and it will be even better than I can imagine. I am getting excited to see how this unfolds!”. I got up early Thursday morning, checked my emails to see if any of the house owners had gotten back to me (which they hadn’t yet), so I wrote my post, and just as I was leaving for my office, an email came in saying that one of the houses was available. The cost for the week was within our budget and everything seemed perfect. As the day unfolded, and emails and phone calls were going around between the owner, myself and Jack, and my sons, everyone agreed: this was the place.

24 hrs ago, I was going on faith. Keeping an open mind, and staying away from the negative “what ifs”. Have you ever noticed that  you rarely hear anyone say, “What if this place  (or situation, or job, or relationship) is magnificent? What if it is even better than I expected?, What if it exceeds all of my hopes?” So many times, people try to keep  expectations low to avoid disappointment. But isn’t living with low expectations a disappointing way to live in the meantime?

Give it a try this weekend. If you are worried about something (or someone), why not say, “What if this is all working out even better than I could imagine?”

“We tend to get what we expect“. Norman Vincent Peale

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