Our hopeful songs

a bluebird in our back yard last evening...he is singing his song hoping to attract a mate!

Worry is such a waste of our lives. Trying to figure out how to deal with things that might be a problem in the future, is taking a step in the direction of creating the very situations that will have to be dealt with (if they do occur). Worrying about tomorrow also takes the life out of today. What is there to be hopeful about right now? What is good about this moment?

Some of your hurts you have cured,
And the sharpest you still have survived,
But what torments of grief you endured
From the evil which never arrived.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

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Watch your step

I hardly ever watch or listen to the news. I’m happy about this. A few days ago, my son Matt finished up filming for a T.V. show that he works on called, The Deadliest Catch. It’s filmed in Alaska, and I guess they just had a storm that was the biggest one in 40 years. I’m really happy I didn’t know this at the time. I’ve never seen the show that Matt works on, and probably never will. I can keep a detached enthusiasm for his life when I don’t see the scary details…which I can do nothing about anyway.

I try not to watch, read or listen to things that scare me. If something is designed to get my attention by inducing fear (worry and concern are just nice names for fear), then I know it is out of alignment with my higher self, and if I “entertain it”, I will feel like I’m out on the ragged edge all alone, worrying about the next step (or even more futile; worrying about someone else’s next step!) and not paying attention to where I am going.

Worry is not a good energy to attach to anything or anyone. Life has a way of working out perfectly if I focus on what I want, instead of what I fear, on what is going right, instead of what could potentially go wrong.

“The next moment is as much beyond our grasp, and as much in God’s care, as that a hundred years away. Care for the next minute is as foolish as care for a day in the next thousand years. In neither can we do anything, in both, God is doing everything.” C. S. Lewis

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Too much information

This morning: The misty field across from our home

Last evening, I heard a mew outside. I knew that it wasn’t one of our cats (or our neighbor’s cats). It was the cry of a kitten, but I couldn’t see it. I went outdoors, in the fading light, trying to see if I could locate the direction of the crying and caught a glimpse of the small yellow kitten on the edge of the field across the street.

I grabbed a plate of cat food and headed across the road, gently calling to it, and thinking at the same time, “We do not need another cat. I wonder if my friend Diana wants another cat? How did a kitten get in the field? Mandy said she wanted a kitten, I wonder if she would want this one?  If I can get him/her where can it stay tonight? I wonder if it is sick? It probably has fleas and loads of ticks…”  Just on and on. Questions, doubts, all the while calling kitty, kitty, kitty.

It was very small, and obviously afraid of people. As soon as it saw me it ran into the deep grass and disappeared. I stayed for a while trying to coax it out and then left the food, hoping it would at least eat. 15 minutes later I heard it again and again I tried to get it, but could not. Then a huge thunderstorm rolled in. The kitten ran across the road and into the woods. I thought about it off and on all night. Said prayers for its safety.

I heard it again this morning, but still could not find it. I left more food out, hoping to bring it nearer to us. As I reflected on the situation, part of me longed for the “simpler days”. When I was a child, if I found a stray kitten or cat I brought it home without a thought of its state of health, the effect it would have on our other cats, or me.  Now I have much more information. Information about cat diseases, flea infestation, cat socialization and the time it takes to integrate a new animal into the home, statistics about this being the time of year when many kittens are born and are very hard to place. When does “information” stop being helpful and start making me crazy?! When I get into the future.

If I stay in the moment, I am fine. If I see a hungry kitten, I am going to feed it. If it will let me touch it, I will bring it home. That is all I need to know right now. I feel a deep sense of relief when I stay out of the future”what if’s”.

 

“He who is not everyday conquering some fear, has not learned the secret of life.”  Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

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Life is a daring adventure (and winner of earrings!)

 

"Most Creative Driver of the class of 2000"

 

When my son Matt was in high school, we shared my car.  My parents let me use one of the family cars as much as I wanted, when I got my license (at 16 ), and I remembered the fantastic feeling of freedom driving out of our driveway, picking up 3 or 4 friends, and heading off, at some un-godly speed, on an “adventure”. If my parents had only known what we were up to, they would have fainted.

When Matt started driving, on more than one occasion, the car would be returned with clods of mud …on the roof! I asked him how in the world mud could get on the roof and he always acted like he was surprised too; “I don’t know mom! I am really careful with the car!” he would say, looking at me with those big, brown innocent eyes. When his yearbook came out, there was a special page for Most Creative this and that …he won, “Most Creative Driver”.
Matt was, and still is, an adventurous spirit…. not the easiest sort of kid to raise if you are prone to worry. The older I get, the more I realize the damage of worry. It causes tension in relationships, and does not prevent one bad thing from happening. If I could have changed one thing about my past, it would have been that I was more present, less projecting of negative thought (worry) into the future, I would have just sat down with my sons and appreciated them more…I didn’t know how fast time would go…they are 29 and 33 now. How did that happen?!

Both of my sons are still adventurous men….I hope that I had a little to do with that.

“Life is a daring adventure or nothing!” Helen Keller

 

P.S. Ingrid from the Netherlands won the earrings!

 

 

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