Listening “in”

taking the first step

The picture above is from my 2011 calendar which is a series of “openings”. I love the feeling it gives me of unknown opportunities behind the closed doors…especially when I am sitting, safely, at my desk looking at my calendar, busy with the life that I have chosen which seems to be working well, at the moment, just the way it is.

I bought this calendar to remind myself that this is what life is about…a series of openings, challenges, and opportunities that, when presented, don’t  necessarily feel bright and clear and welcoming…the path may look like these beautiful stairs in retrospect, but when I am about to make a move, do something new, leave the known because it is time, but I don’t see exactly where I am going, or what it is going to be like when I get there, the picture in my mind can be much more frightening.

Years ago, when I was in Divinity school, I remember hearing the term, “divine discontent”, to describe the feelings that can come up when we are being moved from the inside….moved to expand, grow, change and live a fuller life…when our old way of being has become too small and that is the only thing that we are sure of. But there always is a clear path, as tiny as it may seem,  and it comes in the form of that “knowing” inside. When I can calm down the fear and take a deep breath and listen, there is a something that points the way. It has been called many different things by many different people; intuition, “the still, small voice”, the muse, a guardian angel, Jesus, our higher power, the subconscious mind… I don’t believe that it matters what we call it or if we call it anything. What matters is that we recognize it, and that we trust it, over all outside opinion.

I didn’t notice, until I took the photograph this morning that at the top of this path, over the door was a bell….a call, even when not seen, to a deeper, richer life.

9 thoughts on “Listening “in””

  1. Lovely! Thank you, Mary. Each morning when I am doing one particular yoga posture I turn toward my bedroom door where the light is on (it is still dark outside) and I give thanks for the “light of the open door”.

  2. I am really enjoying your blog postings and am so glad that Jon Katz told us about you in his blog. I loved the calendar picture you used today. Who put out the calendar you have and is it something I could find online? I would love to know this if you have a moment to respond.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts and ideas and insights through your blog! Keem ’em coming….

    Sue R.

  3. Mary, thank you for your amazing insight and for being spot on today. My husband and I have started a journey towards retirement that is a bit unconventional and I have had moments of pure panic for the loss of the familiar and even fear that we aren’t doing the right thing. I do try to listen to that inner guiding voice and find calm at my center when I can shut out the self doubt and the opinions of others. I know it will be ok, wonderful even! Thank you again, you are a gift in my life.

  4. The symbology of this picture coupled with your words is stunning! Something about it all made me cry buckets, which certainly told me it is a personal call to me. I will have to discover what. Thank you, Mary.

  5. I resonate with your words this morning. Oh my goodness. Thanks so much for sending out your thoughts from the soul. Many blessings to you and yours and those animals who find love and refuge at your hands.

    Virginia from Oregon

  6. I, too, found this photograph so very beautiful, and all the more meaningful for your words, Mary. Just yesterday in my yoga class, my teacher reminded us often after doing a particular pose to “pause and feel”, making no judgments, just “pause and feel”. As I look at this photo, I love the wide and spacious distance between the steps. So often, just taking the first step in a life altering change is the hardest. And yet we can and must give ourselves that moment in between steps, to pause and feel. To be still and listen. To rest in the grace of the divine. I am so very grateful for your sharing with us Mary, and for the special friendship that we all share for having come together at White Feather Farm. Love to all, Susan in AZ

  7. Mary, thank you for the beautiful photo and words. Your blog is the highlight of my day.

  8. I can’t tell you how many times I have come back to this particular posting when I feel the fear and doubt creep in. This posting is a spiritual clearing for me and after reading it I feel connected once again. Thank you.

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