It is never to late to look for the gifts

Matt (in the center) living his dream

I remember the day that I found out that my son Matt would be going onto the crab fishing boat named The Wizard. The fears that kept wanting to creep into my mind were really small compared to the confidence that I felt, and still feel, in his sense of inner-direction. Matt would never accept anyone else’s idea about what he should be doing with his life. He has a great respect for people, listens carefully to their experience, judgment, and ideas, but in the end, he follows his heart.

For years, I couldn’t see the gifts that my own parents gave to me. What I considered to be their “defects” just seemed too big.  My parents are both now well into their 80’s (my father will be 87 in May), and when I told them that Matt had realized a dream; to be filming on the Deadliest Catch, they  both said, “How great! I am so proud of him!” Neither said anything about safety or caution or questioned whether or not he was up to it.

I’m not sure that my parents ever really believed in themselves, but they, especially in later years, have developed an unquestioning support and belief in me and what I am doing with my life. I feel the same way about my sons.

“Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit“. e.e. cummings

17 thoughts on “It is never to late to look for the gifts

  1. Matt is very handsome Mary, he looks so happy in this picture with his”band of brothers.” A true gift it is when you can put your faith in someone you love who is following their heart instead of fearing what difficulties they may encounter. My son, Michael is a non conventional person, following his dream of becoming a DJ/Sound Mixer. He pretty much knocks my socks off with his free spirit and faith in himself. Blessings to all on this beautiful spring day!

    • Thank you Terri! There is nothing more uplifting for me than seeing someone take the risk to follow their dream (“free spirit and faith in himself” ….how wonderful!)

  2. I feel the faith and the trust, the belief and the love that comes through your message this morning Mary! It gives me such a warm feeling inside…I watched the episode when the Wizard crew shaved their heads into the ‘mohawks’ for a change in luck! And it happened! It was a terrific catch. And Matt captured every emotion on film…it was one of my favorite episodes! Much love…

    • Oh my goodness…I didn’t know why he had done that! So funny that I am finding out here Kathye! I have watched a few episodes of this season, but Matt being behind, not in front, of the camera, I don’t ever see him!…what a great surprise and thank you!

  3. I can’t believe it Mary. I am a Deadliest Catch diehard fan! Now I can say I know someone on one of the boats. How exciting!!!!

  4. That’s awesome, Mary. Yes, it would make sense that relieving the number one burden off of our shoulders would allow us to enjoy life in a free-spirit zone.

    A self revealing life story: I felt like I reached this particular ecstasy a couple of years after my husband passed; everything was enjoyable and relative and there for my pleasure or confident rejection. Life was so clear. I felt so protected in my comfortable self. Nothing seemed to depress me. All to realize later that it wasn’t really me finding myself or believing in myself rather it was me not caring to find myself, which I guess relieved the pressure, as well. But that glimpse into that freedom has been ultra motivating to realize that I needed to consider rejoining the human race, without my sole mate, and to once again attempt to achieve that same carefree feeling in a more healthy manner. Ah, the joy of the buggy ride of life, huh?!

    It is so lovely to see your son living his dream. What a beautiful sight! It is truly a mother’s ultimate joy to see our children happy.

  5. I just love that phrase, Susan L, the Buggy Ride of Life! Sounds more fun than choppy waters, doesn’t it? Mary, you wrote of Matt, “He has a great respect for people, listens carefully to their experience, judgment, and ideas, but in the end, he follows his heart.” That, dear Mary, was YOUR beautiful mother gift to him, because it sounds so much like how you live, and kids do surely learn by example. His heart, his best inner compass, found its steady mooring in his upbringing from such a loving mother who believed in him and taught him to believe in himself. Job well done! – now go and bask in the sun in Mexico with your loved ones around you and anticipate big adventures together! I feel like we’re counting down the days with you. xoxo

    • thank you for those beautiful words Susan…(and I very much appreciate the thought that you are counting down the days with us!)

  6. You have one handsome son there, Mary, and talented, too! How good for you to know that in addition to all this, he’s able to trust in his own counsel and follow his dreams! Nice job, mom!

    • I appreciate your thoughts Suzanne! I am so looking forward to being with Matt in Mexico. I don’t really care what “we do”….I just want to see him!

  7. Whoaaa. I’ve never seen the TV show but that photo looks like some gnarly lookin’ dudes!! If I was a crab, I’d just jump into the net and beg for mercy. 🙂

    All kidding aside, the long lens of maturity sure shifts our parental defects into unforeseen blessings; how else could we have evolved into the wise, strong, loving beings that I’ve come to know here at WFF?
    Boy, a crab enchilada sure sounds good right now!

    • Cheryl b, by the beautiful sea! I would be only too happy to make the Spanishy-Garlicky ‘Ailolii’ to go with your crab enchildadas. . Your cyberspace or mine??? 😉

      • Oh, my gosh…a garlic aioli on crab enchiladas???! I’m in olfactory/gustatory heaven right now!! Virtually calorie free. (Thanks to a VERY vivid imagination!) Thank you Susan.

    • WHat a delightfully funny comment Cheryl!….Jack and I have a big day ahead of us and we really needed a smile today…thank you!

  8. Your photo reminds me of my son and grandsons photos…They are happily and confidently doing their thing…so perfect…We can thank them for modeling the way for us! (or at least for me!) enjoy enjoy enjoy and loads of smiles from my heart!m

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