When I entered AA in 1986 and read the statement, “Let Go and Let God”, my first thought was, “You will never get anything done that way. You cannot just sit back and expect ‘God’ (what ever that is!) to take care of you”. I feared that I had entered some sort of cult of lazy, unsuccessful people, whose only real “success” was that they didn’t drink anymore. There’s a line from a Simon and Garfunkel song (My Little Town) where he describes the hero in the song as, “twitching like a finger on the trigger of a gun.” …I could identify with that. I was “all wound up and going nowhere” fast. I was nervous, jumpy and didn’t know how to relax without taking a drink. But I stayed and I began to learn a new way of looking at life.
One of the things that I learned was that the right action would be revealed to me if I didn’t blindly forge ahead, doing something that was full of struggle, hard (unpleasant) work, spending unhappy hours full of worry and misery, hoping that in the end, I’d be happy with the result. Equally true, I couldn’t sit back and refuse to budge from my preconceived attitude about the situation (or myself) and expect a higher solution to come through. Neither could I act like a caged animal, trashing about, refusing to relax (which had been very familiar to me) and expect to be receptive to higher guidance.
Learning to relax and trust the part of me that is always connected to Divine Mind; the part that always knows the best road to take, and the perfect action (one that will produce the right outcome) has been the hardest thing for me to do. Realizing that I couldn’t figure everything out with my conscious mind, but at the same time, I had access to all Wisdom, was not a Truth that came easily to me. There are still times when I forget this, and fall into the trap of believing that I am all alone, trying to figure out my own little life with no connection or help beyond my understanding. Those are not my happiest moments.
I know now how life is meant to be (even when I occasionally forget it). I know that I am always connected to an infinitely vast, loving, power that could never give up on me, isnt’ trying to test me to see if I am worthy, is always available to help me expand into a happier, easier and more fulfilling life. I know that struggle happens when I forget who I really am; a part of the All Good.
I intend to say, “I now relax into the Goodness”, over this weekend and I invite you to join me.
“When you refuse to learn a lesson one way, it will be presented to you in anther way. There is always the easy way, but when you refuse to accept it, the more difficult and complicated way will be presented to you. Why not learn your lessons the easy way? Why not be like a little child, eager and receptive to all that is taking place in your life, and unfold with it all, in the most natural way? This is My plan for you, so why make it difficult for yourself when it is not necessary? It only holds up progress when you do. …when you raise your consciousness and keep it raised to a spiritual level in life, to what matters, then vast changes will take place and life will unfold for you without any effort. ” from Eileen Caddy, (founder of the Findhorn Foundation) Opening Doors Within