I’m writing this morning from a hotel in Florida. We’ll be leaving here in a few hours for a B and B in Monticello Florida, staying there 2 days, and then starting for home. Almost nothing has been how I’d envisioned it. I’ve been sharing a room with my brother and niece. It’s been years since I’ve slept in a room with anyone (except Jack or our cats). The days that I thought I’d have alone, have not happened. I haven’t written a word in my journal, read a book, or worked on my writing project. The weather has been mostly in the 50’s and 60’s, so I am not the least bit tanned, and have only worn shorts once.
If someone had told me what this trip would “look like” before I left, I wouldn’t have come. It would have sounded like a tedious exercise in self-restraint.
Happily, I did not know.
My intention for this trip was to be open; to see, feel and experience new parts of myself. What has happened is beyond words…really somewhat beyond my ability to understand. Every time I’ve started to think, “Hey, what about me? How am I going to spend my time? What about my….” I can feel myself contract and become uncomfortable and so have made it my mantra to say, “What is different right now? Show me the perfection of this present moment.” These questions have been some of the most powerful prayers I’ve ever prayed.
I’ve witnessed the amazing patience and generosity of my brother, the sweetness of my niece, and a calmness and inner peace in myself that has surprised me.
I will have few pictures to show, or stories of warm ocean breezes to recount, but what I have learned, gained, and can say that I know, is that life is perfect when we open our hearts. When we drop down in consciousness to the level of the heart and see, hear, and feel life from there, the next step we take can be into a very different world.
“The art of life is to live in the present moment, and to make that moment as perfect as we can by the realization that we are the instruments and expression of God Himself.” Emmet Fox