There is a woman whom I’ve known for years but began to avoid. It seemed like every time I saw her, she was trying to “help me’ spiritually. She would refer to the tradition, and course of study, that was the focus of her life, in almost every conversation. She is a very nice (and earnest) woman, but didn’t appreciate this aspect of her…which seemed to be a very big aspect of her.
Then one day, I had a revelation: She was trying to help me, why not take it? My mind had a fit with this thought and started throwing stories to me that sounded like, “She doesn’t even know what you do for work? She is trying to “up you” spiritually (a lot of this goes on in the spiritual commuity…a lot of ; “I know more than you, and can do more than you can spiritually/energetically”, and this can be tiring, especially if you are one of the ones doing it, but aren’t aware enough to recognize it!).
I had the idea that our friendship (if it was going to be one) should be an “even” give and take, but it seemed like all she ever offered was her spiritual perspective, and I didn’t want it.
Anyway, one day that changed. Something inside just said, “Take what she offers”. Since that day, it is an utter delight to see her. It always helps, and I feel no need to “even things out” because she doesn’t want what I have (and after I got over the ego-hit of that, I was free to receive her suggestions/thoughts, and I must tell you that it has been wonderful). I actually do give back to her, but in more tangible things like soap and skin balm; gifts that she wants, and appreciates.
Once I realized that not everyone needs or wants to hear what I have to say, but some want to give these gifts to me, my world opened up even more.
I’m not talking about accepting someone’s fear-based theology (or cosmology), or feeling obligated to listen to the religious opinions or unsolicited ‘advice” of anyone who wants my attention. I, personally, don’t give an ear to anyone who believes that they know the only way to God/Spirit, or has an exclusive religion. I don’t engage in conversations with people who believe in a vengeful, scary, concept of God, moral finger waggers, or those who believe that they are somehow special because they have accepted some creed, or have the inside track on the Spirit of the Universe.
But this person wasn’t even close to that. I came to see that the real reason I didn’t want to listen to her was only a matter of ego. It was the same feeling that I used to have when I looked at the catalogues of places like the Omega Institute or other spiritual centers. I’d open these up, and look at the faces of those who had been invited to teach/present, and feel instantly deflated. “What is so special about them?” my little jealous mind would say and I’d throw the catalogue/magazine away. My mind wanted to find fault with anyone who seemed to be doing something that I wanted to do, but feared I never would…so I closed myself off in my struggle to be “special”.
We are special…..couldn’t be more so. Each one of us has a unique way, is a unique way, that the Divine is expressing, through us… and as us. Once I accepted the idea that I didn’t need to try to be noticed or recognized as special, once I opened to the help that was being offered to me (almost constantly and from many places), my life began to feel like an adventure. And then the openings happened, the offers came, the opportunities (that I felt were reserved for those who had some special something that I was missing) were presented.
Open up today. Be surprised at how much you will learn, see, and begin to experience, with an open, fearless, mind (and heart) that doesn’t need to prove anything.
“A teacher of fear can’t bring peace on Earth. We have been trying to do it that way for thousands of years. The person who turns inner violence around, the person who finds peace inside, and lives it, is the one who teaches what true peace is. We are waiting for just one teacher. You’re the one.”