My thoughts and words return to me

When I wrote a novel, a couple of years ago, I had no idea that the very things I had written about would begin to happen in my own life. I wrote the novel for its own sake. The process was an adventure (even though I did, at times…many times, need to discipline myself to sit down and write). The main character and heroine of the story, Maggie, became someone who I loved and still do. …maybe that is why the story actually came to life; because I loved it.

I try not to talk about things that don’t expand the world, my world, into a more loving place, and I do the same with what I write. If I approach an issue or something that I perceive to be a problem, with low energy, frustration, anger, disappointment, or some other unhappy feeling, and try to make sense of it, my mind will probably concoct a story, and the story will have a victim (usually me) and a villain (usually them). When I do this, I am also creating my world, but it isn’t one that I love.

For much of my life, I didn’t realize that I had the power to create (through thought and words*) my life, my world. If something happened that I didn’t like, or I thought someone was being unfair to me, I would mull over the injustice, over and over, in my worn-out mind. I would get on, and stay on, a very unhappy track; rehearse it, relive it, and feel it, until it became “my reality”…a reality that I didn’t love but felt powerless to change. But I have woken up enough to see that I am never powerless, none of us are.

I’m not saying that it is easy. Focusing on a happier life, a better outcome, a scenario that would be lovely, when “awful reality” is staring me in the face (and my mind is screaming at me to follow it into the dark alley of doom, disappointment, disease, and disaster) can be the hardest work that I do.

Refusing to entertain unhappy scenarios, and to see only the “good” is truly heroic thinking. But it is truly what we are here to do. We are here to express love….to love life, to love our “creations”. If I don’t love something that is in my life, either I am looking at it the wrong way, or I have created a scenario and a story that is causing me pain…and I have the power to change that.

“Words are bodies or forces which move spirally and return in due season to cross the lives of their creators.”  from The Power of the Spoken Word, published in 1945, Florence Scovel Shinn

*Write Away! Workshop If you are interested in working with me and learning a new way to envision your world through writing I am offering a workshop (that I have named Write Away!) on an ongoing basis. I put it up on my blog a couple of times and it has been so well-received that I’ve decided to make it a permanent part of the work that I offer. The link to the new page on my blog is:

If you can’t access the page, or if you have any questions (like, “Do I need to be a writer to do this work?”…the answer is No to that!, please email me and I will send you the information.

12 thoughts on “My thoughts and words return to me”

  1. Dear Mary, thank you for this reminder to BE love. I am currently challenged with some very stressful issues regarding my beloved horse who is layed-up with an injury. I needed to be reminded that HOW I approach these next several months of his recovery are more important than my frustration about it. Bless you!

    1. Thank you Debra for sharing that your horse is in recovery – it allows us to hold him in our thoughts and prayers (and you, too!) envisioning only warm, gentle healing light around you both.

    2. Debra, I’ll be holding your horse in my thoughts and imagining a return to perfect health for him!

  2. I often wonder if circumspection is a gift that comes in older age. My mother used to say: “you can’t put an old head on young shoulders” and how true this is. It seems many of us go through the same processes of life challenges and issues as Mary has shared here on her blog over the years. Redirecting my thoughts, giving myself time for introspection is a luxury of time and mindful thinking that in older age I’m able to do. However, my son, who is in his late forties now,who has always seen the sunny side of life, who doesn’t have a mean bone in his body, is not able to learn his life’s lessons from the knocks he stumbles upon in his love-life. As he says, he prefers to look on the positive side of life and his mother, me, who listens to the repeats of problematic issues in his life wonder if a positive attitude isn’t belying a lack of reality on his part. Is there a fine line between the two, I wonder.
    Sandy P in Canada

  3. Sandy, I suspect that it takes more than a positive attitude (as wonderful as that is) for us to learn our lessons. I have had to come face to face with the reality– patterns of responding to life that resulted in more problems. And then there’s the further “reality” of choosing to do something different.

  4. Helen, I confess to having to hit a brick wall at times to learn whatever lessons life throws my way but I am more mindful now when that little bell rings in my head and says…better think again. I wonder if we ever change our basic natures?

    1. In a quote from Dr. Abraham Low (founded the self-help group Recovery in his book titled “Selections,” he says “It is human nature to want superior performance and the perfect achievement…And unless you manage to be saint, angel and wizard combined, you will never succeed in getting rid of your nature. Nature cannot be expelled, but in Recovery we have learned that nature can be controlled.” (Selections, p. 124)

  5. Mary Solomon, I suspect Dr. Low is quite right. I remember reading Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz written in the 1960’s and how much that book impacted on my thinking at the time. I still have the book, must look it up again. It can be found on Amazon I believe. As an adopted person, meeting one half of my biological family that I know of, much later in life left me facing the reality of myself when I met my half-sister. It’s a good feeling knowing that one doesn’t have to explain oneself because of how one feels but the embarrassing thing was, she also has a few of the same irritating traits that I do…I chuckled when I realized that she’d irritated me and that I did the same thing she was doing…(smile). Sandy P in Canada

    1. I, too, have that book on my shelf, but I don’t think I ever read it. BUT, lately I have listened to some other lectures or read somethings recently that in a couple of instances the book “Cybernetics” has been mentioned. Must be time to take the book off the shelf! (By the way, loved seeing your photo on Maria’s blog – nice to have such a lovely face to put with your name.)

  6. Thank you, Mary Solomon,…and what I meant to say was the book is called Psycho-Cybernetics, by Maxwell Maltx, MD. In fact, I’m going to look for a new copy, mine is all underscored but I found it very inspiring for me. If I could find a way of putting in a photo on Mary’s site here as you do, I’ll do it but can’t figure out on my Window’s 7, and how it can be done.

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