All is well and a give-away!

I had an extra copy of this book, so it is the "give away"
I had an extra copy of this book, Dying To Be Me: My journey from cancer, to near death, to true healing,by Anita Moorjani, so it is the “give away”. If you would like it, all you need to do is comment by telling us one thing that happened in your life that you felt wasn’t a good thing but turned out well. I’ll pick a random winner tomorrow 9/9.

Our oil company overfilled the oil tank when they made our delivery last week. The man caught his mistake before too much oil spilled out, but even a little bit of fuel oil smells bad, and the odor-killing powder that they put down smelled really strong as well. I spent most of the next few days removing things from the basement so they wouldn’t be ruined, and washing the clothing and bedding that we had stored down there.

When it first happened, I felt somewhat overwhelmed but quickly began to say to myself, “This must be for me, what is the gift?

I’d been wanting to clean out the basement  for at least a year but kept putting it off…I just never felt motivated enough. Suddenly the motivation was right in front of me and not only did I need to clean it, I wanted to. It felt wonderful and freeing to get rid of so many things that I’d been saving just in case I wanted or needed them at some future time.

Bags of books, paintings, mirrors, pot and pans, dishes, sheets, and clothing are all now someplace where they are truly wanted and needed: Goodwill.

“…after my NDE (near death experience) things got a whole lot easier. I no longer feared death, cancer, accidents, or any of the myriad things that used to concern me…I detach myself from preconceived outcomes and trust that all is well.” pg 128 from the book, Dying to be Me” by Anita Moorjani


26 thoughts on “All is well and a give-away!”

  1. Oh no! Glad you have turned this stinky and messy situation into something good!
    When my dryer conked out the night before I left on vacation I didn’t see anything good about that. Now that the new one arrives tomorrow I must remove things from the laundry room to make room for them to get the old one out and new one in. What better time to clean up this space which has become a catch-all for stuff!!!
    Good to know we are never alone in things like this ❤️

  2. When I was in ICU after my heart transplant in July of 2009, I saw the grim reaper. He was waiting for me and I felt (but didn’t see) the presence of my late daughter, also waiting for me. I felt that I had a choice to make – whether to live or die. I was in extreme pain. It hurt to breathe and I couldn’t tell anyone because I was intubated. I realized that I had to live for my family. I wasn’t afraid to die because I felt my daughter waiting for me on the other side. But I knew the rest of my family needed me, so I made the decision to live. This sounds a little crazy maybe, but it was true to me at the time. I would love to read this book.

    1. Oh, Becky, what an incredible story and experience. It doesn’t sound crazy at all. I’ve been close to the experience myself many years ago although I was too ill to sense anything more than just being very ill and an awareness of being close to having a serious problem. I hope you’re heart and you have mended well in the years since,
      Sandy P in Canada

  3. My husband, my favorite person of 22 years, passed away 9 years ago. His loss rocked my world and recovering from that loss has been a process. Ultimately I have met people fabulous people I wouldn’t have met and done things I wouldn’t have done, and my approach to and appreciation for life is much deeper and richer than it was before.

  4. Hi Mary, I am not asking to be in the running for this giveaway but rather want to thank you for your support and wisdom and eye opening way of presenting ideas. My mother (best friend, cheerleader, confidante… the list goes on) passed away August 12; she was 86 (and a half, she would say). I miss her so much it’s physically painful. Every day there are innumerable times when I want to talk with her, laugh with her, have fun adventures with her again. I will be reading this book in hopes that the next chapter, without my mother, is going to happen and be worth it. Sincerely, Cindy you are very important to many as you share your self so well Cindy Kamberelis 926-2227 home 775-8532 work 518-495-2227 cell

    “Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you.” – Langston Hughes

    “Ask not what the world needs. Ask rather what makes your heart sing and go do that. For what the world needs is people with hearts that sing.”Philip Thatcher

  5. As a cancer survivor myself, a mere 16 months, I am also pulling myself back together, coping with side effects of treatment, and hoping to find peace and health. As I travel this path, I love reading about the ways others found to lead themselves to a good and happy place, and learning from them. Thanks for considering sharing the book with others who can learn from it.

  6. Hi Mary! What a great story and ending about how to turn lemons into lemonade! I personally have learned to let go and go with the flow – esp this summer! – which helps release expectation on outcome. I know everything has it’s purpose and there is a bigger picture as to ‘why’ that I cannot see. My discovery that I had been dealing with PTSD about 10 years ago was a turning point for my life. That understanding led me to search for non-traditional ways to heal, which led me to a whole new life and passion. I learned that every illness is a gift if we look to how it happens and what we can personally do to find our way back to wholeness. My journey has been amazing, so I now try to help others look for their own personal healing solutions and path to wholeness when I can. I continue always to stop, look, listen, and learn about that which is bigger than all of us. It’s a magical world if one has eyes to see and ears to hear! Have a most blessed day! Talk soon!

  7. Here I am at the Hope Lodge for cancer patients and family, a place to stay when treatment is required a long way from home. My husband is 63, just retired, has been diagnosed with sarcoma of the soft tissue, stage 4, prognosis is poor. I don’t have a happy ending but I hope that I will be strong enough to carry both of us through whatever lies ahead.

    1. Jacque, prayers and supportive energy from my end to yours. This is a wonderful source of soul nourishment here on Mary’s blog.
      SandyP in Canada

    2. Yes Jacque , as Sandy says there is a supportive community here .. Courage to you as you and your husband face this difficult time together. I want to say to you that you will find strength , somehow. For 6 years I took care of my 60 year old husband after his collapse , and receiving the news that he had cancer . At first I could not imagine how I ,of all people , would be able to. It was like finding oneself on a high mountain precipice. I kept telling myself to not look down . To put one foot in front of the other like on a balance beam. Day after day.
      How I wished I had been more illuminated with what Mary reminds us of today! To try to conceive and have faith in how the universe works for us, no matter how improbable the circumstances at first make seem.
      Susan’s poem by Langston Hughes was beautiful. Also the metamorphosis of the butterfly metaphor ..Be brave , all of you survivors who are facing the swirling eddie and walking the rocky slopes .

  8. Cindy, thank you for including the quotation from Langston Hughes as seeing his name jogged my memory to one of my favorite poems ever, by Langston Hughes. I would like to share it and offer my love and support to anyone here that is going through a rough time, missing someone, in the midst of pain or sorrow.


    Wave of sorrow,
    Do not drown me now:

    I see the island
    Still ahead somehow.

    I see the island
    And its sands are fair:

    Wave of sorrow,
    Take me there.

    -The Collected Poems of Langston Hughes

    Why, why, why couldn’t I find a job? Whatever else was happening in my life I could always find work because my secretarial skills were in demand. Out of the blue I was contacted by an old friend I had not heard from in years. While once very close, we had drifted apart. She had a job for me in a law firm earning more money than I had ever earned before; but it meant moving to a different part of the country. I trusted and I went. I’ve been working with this firm for 16 years now; met my husband through one of the attorneys I was supporting; and now have the happy and fulfilling life I always dreamed would one day be mine. What I thought at the time was a puzzling and bad thing turned out to be the reason a new door to a greater blessing opened!

  10. Mary I’d love to have my hat thrown into the book ring, please.
    One good thing: I was sitting in church one Sunday morning, watching the dust particles dancing along the sunbeams streaming in through the stained glass windows an elderly friend leaned over and whispered: “I have a friend who has moved up to the country from the city and who worked at the Royal York Hotel. She’s bored to tears and is going to start a bed & breakfast accommodation service. Would you be interested in joining?” And that’s how I fell into this business… arse backwards, not knowing a thing about how to run a B&B, not considering how intrusive it could be, it was a bit of a lark. Twenty two years later, I’m still running a bed & breakfast…98% of my guests are so nice I’m sorry to see them leave. Many times, I’ve been overwhelmed by their kindnesses and then there is that 2% who make me feel that I could close my door tomorrow and shut my business down. But it is that 2%, who, while they have aggravated me, challenged me and I grumble about them, I’ve learned how to set boundaries as a bed and breakfast owner and operator in a way that I can feel good about myself. As to the agency, I quickly realized that first year that if I’m the one scrubbing toilets, doing the laundry and baking the muffins, I wasn’t going to give an agency a percentage of the small amount of money I was making. I’ve learned how to set up websites (although I have a webmaster who floats it off into cyber space for me). And it’s been a great focus for me in my life as I’ve grown older. It’s given me a purpose in life outside of my own self…
    SandyP in Canada

  11. A 30-hour, rough labor followed by a C-section delivery of my daughter put to an end my hopes for a peaceful natural birth for my child with the angels singing and me dancing out of the hospital singing with them. For the first few days of her life, as I painfully recovered, her father was her primary caregiver. He became her “mother” so much so that when he walked into the room by her bassinet before he’d even picked her up, she stopped crying. She and I eventually built a strong bond through breastfeeding, and those early experiences with her dad shaped their relationship positively for years to come. She remains close to both of us, and her dad continues to be a hands on father – which is a great blessing for her, and for me, too! 🙂

  12. Mary,
    As a cancer survivor, I have learned to be more patient with people and not let the small things in life bother me.
    I do have a problem dealing with death and think about it daily. Would this book help?
    Thank you for your wonderful blog.

    1. Dear Barbara,
      I do think that this book would help. It is always hard to say what words, thoughts, or experiences will help someone make a shift into a new way of seeing, I find this book to be very comforting.

  13. since surviving cancer twice – I have a definite appreciation for life – but I was reminded of this just in the last couple of days with the untimely death of Joan Rivers. Never have I felt so strongly about the idea to live each and every day to the fullest – with joy in my heart –

  14. Recently, I have had the most wonderful experience on my morning mountain walks here in the desert of Phoenix, Arizona. I was astounded to find on the ground, for only two days in a row, a few dozen very fat yellow and black caterpillars! Here in the desert of all places, most arid and dry. I am also privileged to be near the Butterfly Wonderland Museum, just minutes from my home. I snapped a picture or two of the caterpillars, hoping they could identify what butterflies they may soon become. I believe they will be black swallowtail, though even the butterfly experts were scratching their heads how these caterpillars which usually like citrus, would be on top of a mountain. Day three, I searched for crysallis – none to be found. But it took me back to days in Michigan as a young girl, watching caterpillars change into monarch butterflies. I am thinking tonight as we talk about end of life, lives, dealing with death, perhaps we should notice nature and let it console us. The lowly caterpillar, belly to the ground for most of its life, lucky not to be trammeled upon, almost overnight does a metamorphosis, shedding its old skin, what no longer is useful, hugging into itself, resting, waiting, changing, and suddenly, the old body, no longer of any use, is shed, and lowly worm is now flying, soaring! in a new form altogether. Perhaps there is nothing to fear about dying at all. We will shed our old skin one day, and I do believe we will soar in spirit, unencumbered by weight, thought, memory, – we will just be the sweet spirits we came into this world as being, a baby once again? Who knows?

    1. Susan, what a lovely analogy, thank you for putting it into words here on Mary’s Blog.
      SandyP in Canada

  15. The drastic decision to leave a job in order to cash out retirement fund in order to alleviate an urgent financial situatio was a harsh solution but the only one available. I had to trust that I would find another good job, and when you are middle aged that us a scary proposition – reinventing ones self at this stage can be risky. Amazingly I found a new position that fulfills me like no other – crazy, challenging, but rewarding. I would never have landed in this job without the terrible situation that precipitated the Hail Mary financial solution one year ago.

  16. I moved from IL to MA but was unable to find a job in my then chosen field. I tried solo practice but it made me nervous. It got me to finally accept the next step was to step out into the world as a psychic and life coach. I have now self-published a book. I decided finally to move to VT and had the epiphany that, if I were currently financially comfortable, I would not be taking this next step. While not as difficult as facing stage 4 cancer, it has been very had at times.

  17. Thank you everyone for your comments and stories. I am deeply touched by the level of sharing in response to this blog post. The winner of the book is Cheryl. For everyone else, if you don’t have it, you may want to think about buying it or checking it out of the library. There are pearls of wisdom within its pages that I find truly helpful and deeply comforting.

  18. Dear Mary, I know you have already chosen a winner but I still wanted to answer your request or question about it did we are have anything bad happen to us and it turned out and feel that there is a blessing or a gift coming due to this incident or predicatment we sometimes find ourselves in. Well I would have to say amazing so yes it has happened to me. It was quite awhile ago approxiamately 39 years ago but whose is counting? I was a single divorced mom at the time and I was invited by a friend from college to go on a blind date because her boyfriend a lawyer had a young man, a lawyer that worked for him, that she thought I would like. Well he was really tall and sweet so we went on another date. This continued on for a couple of years and I kept trying to break up with him knowing he had a drinking problem and we would be unequally yoked since I was a spirit filled christian. God had showed me several signs that I ignored or tried to break up but then we would get back together. Finally I found myself pregnant and we broke up just after my son was born for good. You see I knew I wanted this child but he had too many problems. One of the many blessings was that I started back to college when my son Joshua was 5 years old. I tooke a few classes at first while he and my daughters were in school. Seven years later I became a teacher. My life was fine I still wanted a husband someday but I knew that I was content having 3 great kids and a career. My parents always loved my kids and they really loved my son’s father even though we hadn’t seen him for 15 years. Well flash ahead to when my son graduated just barely from high school and started using drugs . Then we put him in a rehab and a few months later the psychologist there said it would be a good idea to find his dad so he could at least see him if only once. So my son and I did with a little private eye detection and we were going to see if he was home on a Saturday night. I thought this was really unlikely but it was worth a try. And low and behold he was and he invited us in. I tought he would shut the door in our face so I tried tolet him know that we did not want anything that Josh just wanted to meet his dad and then the miracle happened. He invitied us in and we talked for 3 hours. He had straighted his life out and was working for a big company doing contracts. He also mentioned he was going to look us up and the next thing I knew he started going down to rehab with me every week. Well we have been married 15 years know and our son finally did straighten out and is in college now getting A’s and B’s . Also you know when you pray for people which I did for my husband sometimes God has a sense of humor because he did give me my husband and an amazing wonderful family, The Gift!

    1. Oh my goodness, Joan, what an amazing story. It could be made into a movie, for heaven’s sakes…Mary, you’re right, the stories here are so heartwarming that I’m glad I came back onto the blog this morning to see the further posts. Where else could we find such support and sharing of our lives, I wonder…I’m thankful to have found White Feather Farm but even more thankful that Mary initiated this in her life and thus in ours.
      Sandy P in Canada and I will make a note to order the book through our local library. I’ve meant to do it before. This will prompt me to do it now and congratulations Cheryl.

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