I’ve thought a lot about forgiveness lately.

I’ve watched myself struggle with it…not wanting to forgive, at times, and yet wanting forgiveness from everyone and every situation where I have been the one to cause pain.

I’ve noticed my tendency to rationalize, to an absurd degree, my part in situations and events that hurt others and realized that if I spent even one tenth the effort in trying to “rationalize” (or look with self-reflective understanding) the other person’s actions, I would find no blame.

To be fair to myself, I do this…often. Yet I’ve also become aware that there is more to do. A part of me has been afraid to open up and hear what others have to say about me…about how I have hurt them or negatively impacted their lives.

It feels odd to say that I am no longer afraid of this…that I feel an open and welcoming energy about it, but it is the truth.

So, why am I writing about this here on the blog? Could someone reading this right now be feeling hurt by me? If so, then I invite you to a conversation…please. I am open and willing to hear you…fully*.

I’m writing this today because the idea came to me early this morning and I said YES to it….




*my email is and this is a good place to begin

4 thoughts on “forgiveness”

  1. Mary, if we spent less time ruminating over our past or present hurts and running scenarios in our minds, we’d all no doubt be better off. But the fact is, just because we may be at the point of wanting to discuss an issue, that doesn’t mean others are there as well. It was ever thus,
    and it’s nice to see your mind busy at work again, I’ve missed you coming into my inbox with thought provoking thoughts,
    Sandy Proudfoot, Canada

  2. Recently God showed me how much time I waste going over how others have hurt me. And yes I am justified by what they did to me especially family. But the thing He showed me was what a waste of my time and energy to go over this. Is it going to change anything? No, except for making myself upset! So I do not want to waste anymore of my life doing that. And how can God forgive me if I don’t do the same. I want The amazing life and blessings God has for me! So I decided to get rid of all the anger and frustration. But I do have to reminder to do it daily and sometimes moment by moment.

  3. wow.. . .you’re brave! forgiveness is one of the hardest things for me, too. Some say it’s ok to forgive and yet not forget. . .just don’t know what that really means. Mary, I so admire the work you’ve done to get to this place with forgiveness.

  4. Forgiven. Forgiven. Forgiven.
    Loving-kindness towards ourselves is the most difficult first step. There is so much goodness in all of our human hearts. Untangling that nasty thread of self-doubt that likes to wrap around it is difficult work; necessary work. Begin with self-love, focusing the energy on our deserving self and all of our inner beauty and goodness.

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