I had a couple of dreams last night in which I felt isolated and alone. As I thought about the meaning of these dreams, it seemed like they were telling me that, although I felt good at a conscious level, something else was going on inside that I wasn’t acknowledging. When I moved to Montpelier, I was surprised and delighted at what a friendly place it was, but over the past few weeks, it hasn’t seemed that way to me. Because I believe that the world is a mirror, I questioned whether or not I had become less friendly, and I could see that I had.
I am aware that social distancing has nothing to do with me personally (people are not avoiding me, Mary Muncil, they are avoiding everyone) but as silly as this may sound, at times, I’ve felt slighted and uncomfortable when people haven’t smiled back, or said hello when I pass them on the street, or at a store, and these aren’t even people I know! I realized that I’d been feeling extra sensitive but not admitting this, even to myself. For instance, if texts, emails, or calls weren’t returned quickly, I’d wondered if I’d done something wrong, or if I just wasn’t really liked…thoughts like, “I’m not that important to other people” have come up..Ugh!
After telling this to a friend, I went for a run, and made a decision to open my heart, greet everyone with a smile, and try to emanate a more loving energy. The result was immediate. The few people whom I did pass seemed open and friendly too. I really want to remember this, but if I forget, and I will, I know that the answers will come, and the guidance will be there, to move me out of my small, self-centered, mind…as long as I am willing to look at myself honestly, admit when I’m feeling off, and not blame anyone or anything for what’s happening in my life.
“You will change the world only when you become the embodiment of that which you want the world to be. You have but one gift in this world that is truly yours to give and that is yourself. Unless you yourself are that which you want the world to be, you will never see it in this world…My mystical experiences have convinced me that there is no way to bring about the perfection we seek other than by the transformation of ourselves. As soon as we succeed in transforming ourselves, the world will melt magically before our eyes and reshape itself in harmony with that which our transformation affirms”. Neville Goddard, Five lessons, pp 73, 77.