Dancing our way through life

Esther on her pillows (which made me think of the song, Celebrate (by 3 Dog Night)! the link to it is below

It came to my attention, after posting yesterday (on assuming perfection in our lives) that some people thought I was saying that having a perfect life meant getting everything we wanted, how and when we wanted it. This is so far from what I intended to convey that I wanted to clarify a bit.

Several weeks ago, I decided to take dance lessons for one reason: so I could dance at my son Tom’s wedding and feel relaxed. I signed Jack and I up, but he was sick for the first lesson, so I went alone. What came out over the next week (as he and I talked about learning to dance) was that he didn’t really want to take lessons…for whatever reason. This left me with the choice to either go alone, not go at all, or coerce him into doing something he didn’t want to do. The choice was mine and I chose the way that felt best inside of me….and called it perfect. What I had originally thought I wanted was for us to go as a couple, have fun learning together, and be able to practice at home.

But this wasn’t Jack’s idea of fun, it was mine, and I had to decide what course would bring the most fun to my life. The way was clear: take lessons alone.

The “perfection” that I am seeking is inner peace, inner joy, inner happiness, no matter what is going on outside of me. It isn’t peaceful to feel like a victim or pitiful. It isn’t peaceful to think that if someone loved me, they’d do what I wanted them to do. …because I could just as well flip that scenario around and say that if I loved him, I would do what he wanted.

The perfect day is one in which I remember the deepest essence of who I am; when I don’t fight the world. It doesn’t mean that I don’t take action or that I just sit on my couch passively Oming away the day, never making a decision, but I know that when I’m upset because things aren’t going “my way”, then I am not in the flow and that’s my cue to look for the perfection. Many times I just claim it before I really feel it, but just saying “Well, this must be perfect” unlocks something inside.

I no longer fight with Life (well, almost never!) and that is perfect for me.

“How would you cope if you had to live in a Disco for a week?” (an unhappy participant at an Eckhart Tolle seminar asks him this question in response to the noise and crowds at the current retreat location). Eckhart responds, “If I couldn’t find peace, then I would walk out the door. Assuming that I was locked in, what’s left is surrender….so I would probably start dancing.”  Eckhart Tolle